HOMESICK

Making a call was the first thing stopped in my mind. I have to tell my family that I have reached Fresno because I believe they were worried about me. So I lent a phone to make a call to ce ria. She said she will be picking me up around 7pm. I was so glad. She is my hero, without her I really don’t know what I should do? Where should I go? How to get there? She picked me up and we had a dinner in down town burger restaurant. The burger was jumbo even I did not order the big one, as what people always say “everything in America is big” so do not order the large one, just take the regular size.

I could not wait to make a call. So I text ed them by using ce ria hand phone. I got to know that I have to pay a roaming if I send and receive a text message, and I have to pay if want to make or receive a call. Seem so materialistic right? We have to pay everything and the tax is around 9% for Fresno. I chose prepaid T-mobile and I did shop some foods in order to survive in few days. Back home, all I wanted to do was just call my family and ceku. I was so fed up because I could not get online as well. It was just so frustrating. It took a long time to get my number being activated and I guess I will not able to do that without my roommate hand. Thanks ce Reni.

With a desperate feeling, finally I called back home. I was crying because I just could not stand anymore. I never meant to drop my tears but it was uncontrollable, I was so happy that I could hear their voice from thousand of thousand miles away. It was just wonderful because I have been missing them even I just away for less than 3 days. Moreover, I miss ceku a lot. It’s hurt me because I can feel how far the distance between us. I did not call ceku, I just texted him because I did not dare to cry again. I have to be strong, cheering myself.

The next day, I went to church with ce ria and Hacer in the morning. That was great; because I could go to church once I reached Fresno. You know what? I realized how different America compares to Asia, from the living style, foods, tradition and many other things. But one thing I found the same is the church, where I found peacefulness in my heart, where I feel like I am home. Jesus is with me. I should not scared, I should not cry, I should be thanked Him because He always with me, I am not alone.

Ceku and Achin will be having on Tuesday. I prayed for them, wishing them all the best. Ceku called me that day after he came back from library. I was so happy. I think around 5 days after I arrived then only I could do video call with him. I feel like I have not seen him for 5 years! The first video call that we had was like a SPECIAL treatment for my desperation. How precious was the time that we had together! You know what? I wish I can meet ceku even for just a while right now. At least we still can see and talk to each other even for just for half an hour every day. Moreover, what I should do all the time is just say thank you to Jesus. We still can be together while we are apart. That’s good enough for me.

how precious was that time...

Alien da fresno

Finally I have gone through my first week in Fresno. I arrived on the 16th of August 2008. I was exciting, nervous; all the ridiculous thoughts were in my mind until today. Yet, still I could not believe that I AM IN AMERICA right now. Everything was like a dream for me, and now it’s true. When I stepped down my feet in San Francisco, I wanted to shout out to the world and to myself that AMERICA here I AM! I was carrying two big suitcases and 3 hand bags and I got to continue my last flight to Fresno. It was my first experience travelling thousand miles away from home alone. Spending more than 24 hours to reach the destination; sitting on the huge plane, waiting for the boarding time, watching and listening to the air FM, reading the purpose driven life, and talking to the person beside me. After been through all of that, something terrible was happened in San Francisco. We have to pass the strict security check and custom clearance otherwise we will never be allowed to enter United State. I even had to take out my shoes and my scarf to the boxes. Everything was fine, but my stuffs were split and it was heavy! I reminded myself not to forget to check my stuffs completely when I leave to make sure that everything was clear. this photo was taken in Nari ta Japan (the lonely me)

45 Minutes before my boarding time, I realized that I missed a folder of my important documents. OH my goodness, I was shocked and panic, how careless I am! I was telling myself not to forget my stuffs but still I left it out there. Realizing my carelessness, I quickly ran to the place where I left my stuff. There, I talked to the immigration officer and he tried to help me out of my trouble at the end. He called and checked my documents at the security office in the airport and it was there! My documents are safe *_* How lucky am I! I thanked God for letting me out of this trouble. I could board just in time to my last destination. An hour of trip me bring me to Fresno.

Do you know what my first impression to Fresno was? FRESNO is HOT! When I arrived it was about 104F which is almost 40C. It’s considered as one of the hottest city in California because it located in the valley of California! I felt like burning my skin under the sun light even when it was around 4pm. Ms. Linda is the one who picked me up in the airport. She is a volunteer for arrival assistance for new international students. I was so glad that when I walked out from the plane she was there waiting for me with her warmest smile. She hugged me and welcomed me to Fresno. Somehow I felt so bad that time because she helped me to carry my heavy suitcase. She drove me around the campus before she sent me to my new home.

I am home staying with an Indonesian American family in Fresno, my friend, ce inge is the one who found the house for me. The house is lovely, so does my room. I love it very much. I never expect to get that kind of lovely room. Everything is provided, furniture and even the rest room. It’s really good enough for me. My host, they are originally from the capital city of Indonesia, but they have been immigrated to America for more than 50 years. They don’t speak Indonesian with me, they speak English to me. It’s just occasionally I found out them willing to speak Indonesian with me, especially om ad. He never wants to speak Indonesian to me. But he is nice and adorable. That’s all I can say

the day i went away

It was on 15th of August, the day when I really have to say goodbye to my family and my friends. It was really a hard time for me. After I finished my exam and it was not a great exams! I had a barbecue with my friends in Subang and at that night we had say goodbye to Eric. I really HATE to say goodbye. I am wondering why there should be a farewell after a meeting. It's just really hard to understand. it's like a life and the death.
I just couldn't believe that finally it's the time for me to go. The time that i have waited for so long. I am going to meet uncle sam. After spending approximately 2 years in Malaysia, now i have to go to continue my study. The time flew like a blink of my eyes. it's just too fast!!
You know what? I was crying all over the time that night. I just couldn't stand anymore. I told myself to be strong, I forced myself to smile, everything is just the opposite! I AM WEAK.
After packed all my stuffs in two big suitcases and 3 hand carry, finally I was done. I wish I could spend those few worthy hours with everyone there. But I could not do so because most of them were having exams that day. It was just TOO sad.
so I spent my time writing letters and cards to my family and friends.
ceku was picking me up earlier because we wanted to have dinner before I go to airport. We had our dinner in Bondi. My favorite menu seems not delighted even it was! Because i had my dinner with my tears falling off. That was bad because I just ashamed my self. I am so childish!

No matter what i felt sad that time, messages were coming in to my phone and all the good bye and good luck wishes from many of my friends. That was really hurt me, because I was really not ready to say good bye. Lepi and tante told me that they would not sending me to airport because they have to prepare for the next exam. I was just so sad to know about that because I have not hugged tante before I leave Inti.

Even though I knew that they were telling lie, but i was just so tempting and I cried easily.
When I reached the airport, THEY WERE THERE! ALL OF THEM.
my friends from subang, all of my close friends in INTI. Everyone was there. it was around 27 of them.
Shu, Wisen, Fery, Chelsea, erna, Kitin, and Marco came from such a distance just to send me to airport. I was so happy and again i could bear my tears no more.
Lepi, tante, christine, meliana, dustin, arip, rio, nathan, edo, jerry, indra, iva, shu yi, kelwin, foo sean, setiawan, chin n also ceku...
EVeryone was there to send me off. I really thanked everyone for everything...
I was really touched. I can be strong because of all of you. Your support, help, care and many more!
I will never FORGET EACH AND EVERYONE THERE.
You are lovely. You are the best. I am so lucky that i have this precise CHANCE to know all of you.

Love u all.
wish me all the best in my new life in fresno.

Counting down

Another 14days left before I have to depart to the country of Uncle Sam. I AM EXCITED, but I just and I AM not sure whether i have ready to go or not!
There are so many things in my head:
- MY SOciology trial
( I don't care! no matter what, we have to win the trial. We have to fight until the end of the TRIAL! Because we come to win not to Lose the trial)
once the trial completed, I am sure that I will miss you guys.
thank you for putting so much effort in this trial..thank you for everything you guys have done.

- the coming of Final exam
I have not ready for my final exam..but I will do my best of it. I have to continue my preparation...


- MY FAMILY.
I AM MISSING them right now. I miss them all the time.
I can say nothing except I love you all.

-ceku
ceku...I WILL MISS YOU
huhuhuhuhuhuhuhuuhuhuhhuhuuh..let me cry..let me cry

-my Friends
lovely friends! I will never forget you guys. Thanks for being such a nice,charming,and caring people.
I will bring our memories until the end of the time.


-preparation to fresno
i hope everything will be on the right track even though I still have so much things to do!

and many...
many
many more ..

and when I have to say good bye

Just couldn't stand..I was crying so badly and still and I don't know how to stop it right now. 8 days being with them was really sweet and unforgettable. They just gone for few hours but I can feel how tough it is right now.
love you mom, love you dad, love u sisters..I will surely miss you all.
Thanks for everything.

have to prepare my self for tomorrow test..
see ya! huhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhu

ketemu keluarga tercinta besok! I love u all

yuhuuuuu..I miss my blog so much!
This is the only time left for blogging...
some missions have been completed over this week, I have got my visa, my ticket, and I have accompanied my brother's friends from China, and some more I have done for my SPSS project.
Overall, I just feel tired, but I am so excited!
My flight will be in the 15th of August at 10.30pm. I have to transit for five times to reach Fresno, From Kuala Lumpur to Singapore to Tokyo to San Fransisco and Fresno. I am scared that I will get jet lack! I am wondering that time, I am not sure I have ready for 100%, maybe the matter is just about the time because I really feel it's passed like a blown wind.
3 days trip with ati ge ge and tsuan tsuan cie cie was so nice, I won't forget that trip. They are so lovely, I wish I could have more time to accompany them one day! They are truly shopaholics! They shopped a lot and all are branded! like a blink of my eyes when I fetched them and sent them to airport. The time has passed again...
I have done my SPSS projects and now I have to study for the whole day (today) to prepare my self for the next test. My sociology trial's developments were so complicated, I have to cracked my head to think about the solutions! I won't be attending the class for the whole week start from tomorrow because I have a trip with my family. But I still have to follow the progression of my trial, I hope everything will be OK, especially my trip with my family, I hope all the plans will be all right. Jesus I lift up all to you!
gotta go study, see ya blogger!

desperado

Happy Saturday! Saturday will be ended again in 3 more hours. I think it will be a wasted weekend again. I really want to learn how to stop wasting my time because I keep wasting it if I have a spare time. Like today, suppose to study for Statistic, but I don't think I have done it perfectly. I did my assignment in behalf of my obligation, but I don't think I did it with the whole concentration.I just simply did it, without putting so much effort which I should actually do because I don't have enough time to prepare my self for the next test. Next week will be so path, some plans are progressing! This Monday I will be going to Wisma MCA to take my visa and I will spend the rest of the day in KL to do some preparations before my family arrival next week and to buy my air ticket. on the next day our club will be having mass celebration. So does Wednesday, I have to pick up my brother's friends in airport and accompany them for the next 3 days in KL. I guess it's a bit tough job for me, because none of them could actually speak English, so I have to communicate in mandarin with them with my limited Chinese vocabulary. I am scared that I couldn't catch up in the conversation, I really getting nervous now, but its challenge me too! Like what my brother told me before, be confident and just take it as practice so everything will be on the track. I surely will learn so much things from this trip!
After accompany them, the next 2 days will be the day that I have waited for so long! My family arrival in KL. I will not be attending my classes for the whole week. I hope that will be the nicest trip I have ever in my life. It will be my last trip with my family before I depart to America. Kind of sad to know that it's a true that I will never ever predict when will I have this kind of trip again once I go to America.
Cheer up my self! cheer up lien! your life must be going on, don't be so sad, don't be so disappointed, don't cry, just carry on your life! catch your dreams. I am so happy to know, once I feel so down, somebody will look for me, without me telling them that I need someone to talk to. It's one of the miracles that Jesus has passed to me, that what was in my thought. After so long, I didn't even contact with one of my high school's friend whom I used to talk to last time, he came and buzzed me. we talked and shared our stories, experiences, and dreams together. Thanks God that he really came to me on time, so I could feel much more better to continue my day. His suggestions, his words will always echoes in my ears, my mind and my heart. What a delightful conversation! "A hell of what people talk about you, as long as you do your best, because others might never know how hard have you been struggling!" I was stained by my tears when he said that sentence. I just feel that he really understand what I feel that time. Just a simple words I could say to him : "Thank you"
My life foundation is not hard enough to sustain my self to continue to survive, so I have to rebuild and reform my life's foundation for my survival!
I promise, I will. No matter how long I will be graduated, as long as I do my best in my study, everything will be OK. 23 years old was not too bad to get my Bachelor as long as what I do is the best I do as someone told me! Although I have to face the truth that My younger sister might be achieving her bachelor sooner than me and my friends might have a great experience in working force when I still studying. Come on lien, being late in completing your degree will never always shows that you are not capable! The next day will be harder than today, never stop work hard, ok?
10.10 pm. In approximately of next 11 hours from now will be the 6th month being together with ceku.
always and always love you